~ Wayward Woman ~
Well, I have found the source of my problem. It is myself. Surprise, surprise ~ I should have known it all along however, I bought the lie, hook line and sinker. Now what do you do to fix it. I am not sure but I now see that I’ve been very double-minded ~ asking God to release me from my job yet still working because I feel guilty about not having enough money to take care of our expenses. I say I trust Him, that I know He will provide, yet I’ve not let go of the job. Now how can He help me if I won’t listen?! How can He show me the way to go if I won’t stand still long enough to get direction. I have been wavering, going back and forth, making myself and my family miserable. I am tired, depressed and very angry. My body is in total rebellion. I need to exercise, I need a long nap, I need to relax and I can’t seem to do it. The pain in my back is now moving up and down my body causing other parts to ache. Ooch!, but I still haven’t quit my job. My holiday job is coming to a close and I’ve truly enjoyed that job but I don’t think I’m suppose to continue working there either. What am I thinking? One minute I long to be at home and the next, I want to work and enjoy the fun of it. Am I insane, going crazy or just trying to have my cake and eat it too?! This insanity must end and I know just what I need to do.
Lord, I humbly come before you asking for wisdom, which you give liberally to those who ask. Lord, I want to be released from this double-life, from the desire to do too much and to be more than I can. I desire to live simply, lovingly, using my gifts for your glory without pain or stress on my mind, body and family. Lord, I thank you for your divine intervention today. For I know it was by your Spirit I came to this knowledge of my double-mindedness. I yield to your will and I ask for forgiveness. I will follow wherever you lead and I will do as you desire so that I may have the desires of my heart. In Jesus’ name, I pray Amen. Thank you, Lord.
I will begin anew today. I will not make plans for tomorrow until I hear from my Lord. Are you willing to let go and let God too? Are you willing to admit that you’ve been trying to do it all and asking Him to honor it afterwards? Guilty ~ today, lets both pray the above prayer, asking for forgiveness and direction to correct our way. May the Lord richly bless you and direct your path in the way He has chosen for you to go.
