Reflections ~ I Will Never Be the Same Again
The funeral was today and I sensed such peace just about the time the family were returning from the funeral. I know it may sound strange, but I did. It was a sense of knowing that the Lord had taken them up into His loving arms and was holding them close. That is so wonderful ~ that our heavenly Father loves us so much to want to come near and hold us close and that we truly mean that much to Him.
These past few days have been hard for me. I didn't know Missey personally but she spoke into my life through her words of wisdom and sharing her family on her blog and yahoo groups. The family's suffering and lose of her is felt very deeply because of the way in which it occurred for one reason, and because she was such a vital asset to the homeschool community and the Body of Christ. A friend from home also died similarly a few months ago and I don't think I actually grieved for her. I haven't been able to share with the family my sympathy and as a mother, I feel the lose deeply of neither of them ever knowing their precious gifts in this life. Yes, they will meet them in glory but its the now that makes my heart break.
I have been doing a lot of praying for the saints, realizing again how much we need to hold each other up ~ stand in the gap ~ be there for one another spiritually. Its not an option either, we are commanded of God to do this for one another. Its amazing how many christians don't realize its their responsibility to pray for their fellow brothers and sisters in Christ or they choose to be like Cain and say "am I my brother's keeper," as if they didn't know the answer was yes.
I haven't been keeping up with my daily devotions since the news, I've been living it instead. I choose to stand in the gap, to be the armour-bearer for my fellow sisters and brothers. I choose to intercede on their behalf ~ to go to the throne of grace so they might receive mercy. No, this hasn't always been my stand, nor have I been very diligent at it of late, but know it is my heart's desire and I have had experience doing so in the past. I did truly miss the sweet fellowship with the Great Intercessor that spending time in this type of prayer brings. Well, its back and I am ever so glad I opened my heart and made room for Him to enter in. I've got a long way to go still, some purging and re-acquinting myself with Him, but I look forward to it. As scripture indicates "He will make in me a new heart" and "I'll be white as snow" and "live in the newness of life" because of His purging. So, the new me is on the horizon, the me that is changing from glory to glory in His perfect law of liberty. I am being made new and whole again, which I am very grateful for and desperately needed. Its been a longtime coming ~ oh, how patient He truly is. He's been waiting for me to come, what a loving Father. Thank you, Lord.
Well, I must go now, it is getting late and I would like to update my other blogs and try not to cry. I've been doing a lot of that lately, I first thought it was hormonal then due to the death, but now see it is part of the closeness with Him and seeing His heart ~ His love for His dear children.
Know that you are loved beyond image and that He has and will continue to go through great lengths to reach you. To bring you close, draw you into His arms and love on you. Please let Him in your heart, let Him mold you and make you the lovely, usable vessel you are created to be. You'll never be the same again. Umm, reminds me of a song we sang at my home church, I'll write the some of words below. Have a blessed week!
I will never be the same again
I can never return, I've closed the door
I will walk the line, I will run the race
And I will never be the same again (repeat)
*I believe this is a worship song by Hillsong
I'm seeing the AO list slowly returning to normal, people are blogging about other things, but I still don't feel ready to return to the routine of life as normal.
I'm glad to read of the joy you've found through intercessory prayer.
Posted by Leslie Noelani Laurio | 2:00 PM